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The teachings and messages of Guru Jeff are finally reaching the rest of the world. Regardless of what the government says, there are many testimonies that prove beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Guru Jeff, leader of the Church Of The Holy Pinecone, LLC is not a god, but the "All Knowing One."
Read the following testimonies, basque in Guru Jeff's glory and feel free to support the cause by sending a voluntary cash donation.
| Name: |
Mike |
| E-Mail: |
mike@none.com |
| City/State: |
Seattle WA |
| Country: |
USA |
| Home Page: |
www.HeMaleOrSheMale.com |
| Date: |
Mon Feb 20 18:06:46 2006 |
| Reason for visit: |
Searching for the path to enlightenment |
Mike Testifies...
LOl, loved the quiz! You rock, Guru ...Before I go, my friends think I'm nuts, but you are a god. I worship the ground you walk on!
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| Name: |
Chris |
| E-Mail: |
kris.heartely@gmail.com |
| City/State: |
Halifax/Nova Scotia |
| Country: |
Canada |
| Home Page: |
chrisoneil4.tripod.com |
| Date: |
Mon Feb 20 11:06:57 2006 |
| Reason for visit: |
Came here for advice and truth |
Chris Testifies...
This page gave me hope for actualy finding a job. I have a lot of trouble kissing ass, because I think it's stupid. But for once it actualy makes since. I can't even get a job at Tim Horton's because their expectations are set way too high. I have to go now, but I'm so happy that your teaching are finally reaching the rest of the world!
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| Name: |
A |
| E-Mail: |
F |
| City/State: |
M |
| Country: |
U |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Mon Jan 2 20:17:33 2006 |
| Reason for visit: |
I am an active follower of Guru Jeff |
A Testifies...
I love you SATAN!!!
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| Name: |
A |
| E-Mail: |
F |
| City/State: |
M |
| Country: |
U |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Mon Jan 2 20:15:06 2006 |
| Reason for visit: |
Other |
A Testifies...
Pitiful that you are not around to respond to these in true understanding Before I go, my friends think I'm nuts, but you are a god. I worship the ground you walk on!
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| Name: |
Amanda |
| E-Mail: |
FireFairyFCG@aol.com |
| City/State: |
Michigan |
| Country: |
USA |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Mon Jan 2 20:13:16 2006 |
| Reason for visit: |
I am an active follower of Guru Jeff |
Amanda Testifies...
gleefully sarcastic guru one. In addition, you say you aren't a god; I think you are lying.
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| Name: |
Amanda |
| E-Mail: |
FireFairyFCG@aol.com |
| City/State: |
Michigan |
| Country: |
USA |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Mon Jan 2 20:11:09 2006 |
| Reason for visit: |
I am an active follower of Guru Jeff |
Amanda Testifies...
In addition, out of greed you change the last line of your submitted testimony, you must really think you are that god, eh? P.S. I think everyone who who dreams of world peace and understanding should donate 10% of their yearly earnings to you. My check is in the mail!
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| Name: |
Amanda |
| E-Mail: |
FireFairyFCG@aol.com |
| City/State: |
Michigan |
| Country: |
USA |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Mon Jan 2 20:08:07 2006 |
| Reason for visit: |
Searching for the path to enlightenment |
Amanda Testifies...
In my last testimony I did not add the last line, which bares a typo in the discussion of most important matters. I cannot even ask to some day be as wise as you are, for if you were ultimately wise, I would wish to be wiser, not out of greed, but as to do it in my own way and style. To add unto myself, fill myself like a pitcher of water, and upon reaching the rim, keep pouring until none is left to be gathered. In addition, you say you aren't a god; I think you are lying.
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| Name: |
Amanda |
| E-Mail: |
FireFairyFCG@aol.com |
| City/State: |
Michigan |
| Country: |
USA |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Mon Jan 2 20:03:03 2006 |
| Reason for visit: |
Searching for the path to enlightenment |
Amanda Testifies...
From your enlightment quiz, and the answer you bore for my results, I can say that I might not exactly be able to tell my future, but it has been turning out well for me, and I know it will be well. I also know what choices to make and I make them thoughtfully.
As for you, you may be enlightened in your own mind, and your enlightenment may be very different than that of other individuals. So this test of self enlightenment, are the results on fair grounds set to the results showing after you took the test yourself?
Are you testing to see if one is enlightened or testing to see if one is enlightened in the same manner as you are yourself? I guess what I'm trying to say in that I should only hope to someday be as wise as you are.
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| Name: |
neil |
| E-Mail: |
neilcater@yahoo.com |
| City/State: |
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| Country: |
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| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Sat Dec 17 22:37:51 2005 |
| Reason for visit: |
Other |
neil Testifies...
anything you write here gets changed.*end* In closing, before I had read your site, I didn't know what understanding was! Thanks Guru Jeff, you are my hero!
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| Name: |
neil |
| E-Mail: |
neilcater@yahoo.com |
| City/State: |
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| Country: |
u.s.fuckinga. |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Sat Dec 17 22:36:05 2005 |
| Reason for visit: |
Other |
neil Testifies...
good info. oh, and thanks to all you jerks plugging your pill products and cellphone tones on this and clogging a once great way to learn about the world with your make a buck shit. i hope you burn to death in your bed. I have to go now, but I'm so happy that your teaching are finally reaching the rest of the world!
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| Name: |
Matthew Goh |
| E-Mail: |
hi@matthewgoh.com |
| City/State: |
Penang |
| Country: |
Malaysia |
| Home Page: |
www.matthewgoh.com |
| Date: |
Wed Dec 14 10:06:18 2005 |
| Reason for visit: |
Stumbled upon this site from a search engine |
Matthew Goh Testifies...
First of all, please allow me to say hello to you, thank you for your time and may God bless you.
My name is Matthew Goh, from Malaysia. God has been very kind to me for the past 40 years of my life. He has thought me so many things and I feel so close to him. I want to serve him, and I feel it's time for me to start
doing so.
I wrote my self-profile (testimony) titled "Believe - the purpose of life" in year 1998, at the time when I was in great financial trouble. Here is a quote from the book:
"Today is 20 September 1998. I started to write this profile just a few weeks ago, to testify about God's love for me and his performed miracles I have witnessed. Now, halfway writing this, I was told that I would be retrenched from my present job. I know it will be difficult for me to find another job due to the current economy recession in Malaysia. Worst still, my wife Elaine is pregnant and my baby daughter Caitlin will be delivered in about five weeks from now. I feel the great pressure and burden. My greatest scare and pain are to see Elaine and Caitlin suffering, who I place far more important than myself. Despite the current problems and hardship I am facing, I continue to pray hard to God and I determine to complete this profile to show my strong faith in him."
God answers my prayers, again and again. In fact, he has done more than that.
I have created a website http://www.matthewgo... solely for the purpose of allowing easy access and convenient reading of my book (testimony) titled "Believe - the purpose of life". Please read it at your leisure. I am convinced of his love, and I would like to share my experience with you.
May God bless you and be with you always.
Want to be a servant of Christ,
Matthew Goh The only thing I have left to say is thank you for all your help! If one person is responsible for world enlightenment it is you Guru Jeff.
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| Name: |
Jackie Kelly |
| E-Mail: |
JEKitchen2005@hotmail.com |
| City/State: |
Kalamazoo, MI |
| Country: |
Kalamazoo |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Fri Dec 2 21:17:01 2005 |
| Reason for visit: |
I am an active follower of Guru Jeff |
Jackie Kelly Testifies...
I hate Capital One. How can we get rid of them? They are hurting many of us. They don't care what they do. Let us get Consumers Report to tell the story.
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| Name: |
matt |
| E-Mail: |
n/a |
| City/State: |
chicago, il |
| Country: |
usa |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Thu Dec 1 23:09:14 2005 |
| Reason for visit: |
I'm a government agent spying on your cult followi |
matt Testifies...
very enriching site The only thing I have left to say is thank you for all your help! If one person is responsible for world enlightenment it is you Guru Jeff.
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| Name: |
The Best! |
| E-Mail: |
tabu@top.com |
| City/State: |
Los Angeles |
| Country: |
USA |
| Home Page: |
replica_watch.fiberia.com/replica-watch.ht |
| Date: |
Fri Nov 11 09
/TR>
| City/State: |
Leeds |
| Country: |
UK |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Thu Nov 10 16:15:02 2005 |
| Reason for visit: |
Stumbled upon this site from a search engine |
Lorrina Testifies...
The only thing I have left to say is thank you for all your help! If one person is responsible for world enlightenment it is you Guru Jeff....
i DID NOT WRITE THAT!!!!! SIGNED Lorrina
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| Name: |
Lorrina |
| E-Mail: |
spookybaba@hotmail.com |
| City/State: |
Leeds |
| Country: |
UK |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Thu Nov 10 16:10:38 2005 |
| Reason for visit: |
Stumbled upon this site from a search engine |
Lorrina Testifies...
I would just like to say that it was a joy and pleasure to read the advice and stories on Kissing ass!! It cheered me up! Thank you xx The only thing I have left to say is thank you for all your help! If one person is responsible for world enlightenment it is you Guru Jeff.
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| Name: |
Al J |
| E-Mail: |
aljnyc1@yahoo.com |
| City/State: |
NY NY |
| Country: |
USA |
| Home Page: |
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| Date: |
Thu Nov 10 14:44:47 2005 |
| Reason for visit: |
Searching for the path to enlightenment |
Al J Testifies...
Those slimy bastards turned off my card claiming I asked it to be closed. Liars! So now I'm on the road with no credit card and they don't give a rat's ass! I lost all the miles I earned as well and their response ... "You need to reapply for another card sir."
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